15 Nov

Rewriting my thesis | Life as a PhD student #21

you know people say that doing a PhD changes you as a person on basically every level right psychologically emotionally physically you are different what I’m trying to say is I have a beard now so we’re coming into the last few weeks of the PhD mail and things have been getting very hectic and very stressful recently so you have to remember that most PhDs have at least two supervisors right now the main supervisor and then you have a second supervisor that’s you see less frequently and there like a check or a balance on the system and I recently showed my thesis about hundred pages long it’s still not complete yet – the second supervisor and the reason everything has been particularly stressful recently is because basically he disagreed with the direction that my main secret eyes were taking with the project and didn’t feel comfortable with me submitting as it was so what that’s meant practically is I’ve basically had to rewrite the whole thesis you’ll have to excuse the slightly shoddy audio I left my microphone in the office you might have noticed by the way that I have some writing advice from my supervisor on my desk the cat sat on the mat because basically that’s the style of writing that you want it what rather he wants to see in a thesis it’s got to be simple it’s got to be subjective and to the point well one of the big problems with my first draft was that I was trying to write it in a way that was a little bit more poetic I guess like trying to use fancy language and like be more it be inappropriately evocative so today I basically finished rewriting chapter two which is the background chapter and I’m completely psychologically exhaustive like trying to bear in mind the entire PhD worth of background across loads of different sort of sub sections trying to keep it all up in here and all the intricacies to debate my supervisor my own axiom and you know changing 40 odd pages of anything and either adding appendices adding in closer II like all this stuff is just like it’s a lot at once fortunately today is Monday which means that I actually get the evening off recently I’ve been working from 9 until 8 kind of thing I yeah I’ve been pushing it quite hard recently where as it’s currently six I’ve just finished and now got to go and do some stuff over there in town you see that all focus cathedral thing where I was really small when it’s far away that might be the dumbest thing you’ve ever so [Music] so we just did the San Martin’s concert which is what we do every week it’s like a short little choral music I think I actually fell asleep in the middle of a solo I was doing like I have no recollection of like four or five notes I’m really tired [Music] but just a like 800 calories of pasta because I was too tired to make anything else like tortellini not not just like spaghetti so just pop home and have dinner because I’m cheap well and also very much money um because I’m only going out again to engage in little tradition the downline we’re doing for the last couple of weeks [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music] thanks ed so there’s this bomb in extra called Holland rule which is which is very out-of-focus apparently and basically they can showing Game of Thrones every week this is not improving I’m not pretty dodgy patient surveys that they done on I’ve been coming here for the past couple weeks to watch Game of Thrones with a crowd of E as you can see behind me is pretty kings of Game of Thrones E in there anyway dams also here we’re gonna watch that game [Music] unfortunately we both have this ruin for us because of internet so we knew it was going to happen in the end what is some of them I knew well we knew that we knew about the drag no one tells me nothing this episode I cannot Christ elections the finale hand and she walked away she’s been hurt by too many men in her life but she doesn’t have a field and that’s touching on issues that game of thrones hasn’t done before and it’s AA man down more emotionally compromised sweaty working a lot now would you look at that it’s time for my audition so I’m here in Cornwall house this is a remote anything I’ve shown you before because I’ve not been in here before this is one of the upstairs rooms because I can’t get into the downstairs rooms because my student card doesn’t work anymore so I am here to take a break from work to eat lunch and I’m actually doing something I haven’t done for quite a long time which is some sax practice sax s a X no not no not I forgot I have to do something else bollocks so basically I forgot I was meant for taking some pictures so that’s now done that was really quick [Music] so it is currently half-past eight I stated no for so long the camera I was doing a time-lapse and it ran out of battery so yeah I pushed it kind of hard tonight because I just kind of hit a groove I was rewriting chapter three which is my theory chapter based on the feedback I got from my second supervisor about the background chapter and it’s amazing that now I look back on what I thought was good and the way I was supposed to write it and go oh god it’s so obvious what I was opposed to do um so I think really really hope that when I show my supervisor he’s gonna be like yeah yeah you’ve got it now you get the idea I’m really quite tired they’re like a really really fit it’s always a difficult balancing act to try and strike between pursuing the work to the degree in which you know you can like tonight I knew that if I just kind of kept going I was in like a weird fuzzy kind of space where I really just wanted to kind of keep going and I don’t know I wasn’t getting distracted I wasn’t getting bored I just kind of kept it kept going at the same time I know that if I push it too hard I won’t be able to work in the future I want to burn out so I thought the reasonable cuts off was an 11 hour working day also in truly historic news for the PhD the big run of inverting 35 I think it is years might be more of potential vorticity the the big code that I was sort of building everything up to that’s now done it finishes tonight and I was like right okay let’s just make sure that’s saved the note that’s in that’s in Dropbox so one of the things I’m going to do tomorrow morning is to take the output from that and actually use it to to get the variable which I’m looking at that might take more than a day to calculate though I’m not well I’ve not done it before okay I’m just about to go in weird gay so I’ve got a meeting first thing about my thesis rewrites I then have a bunch of programs to run on the output of the inverter and a little bit more coding to do you on another well whenever it is related another related project and then I’m coming home at lunchtime for reasons which will become clear to the meeting went fine this morning I’m basically talking about you know the protest making with the thesis the original look through the output of the inverter means that everything’s come up physically I’ve got a program which I wrote to check how accurate it inverted it you know comparing it to observations that look great you know very happy with that the initial statistical look for it it’s like yeah your hypothesis doesn’t work at all which you know it’s fine a null result is still a result it’s still something you can write up in the science paper and say you know we tried this it didn’t work don’t try this I’m still valuable to know do we Barrett it were they so I was just packing up my things to get a home and I realize I have a pizza in my bag I bought pizza on Monday and I just totally forgot about it because I put it in the bit of my bag which has like a laptop in and not the middle of it where I put I don’t know like I bought ketchup and stuff I doubt but I’ve just been carrying a pizza with me for the past two days so obviously of things very intense at the moment and over the course of the past I think five weeks I took one day off like even working weekends as you saw yesterday they’re very long days and it has been I’m a level of tithe I don’t know if I’ve ever been before this is approaching what I felt like you know it Oxford finals so it’s important to take care of myself which is why I’ve come home and give myself half a day off this week and you may ask why on Wednesday or not on the weekend but there’s two reasons one I worked better on the weekends like when there’s no one in the office office some reason I just seemed to really really work well secondly though just because it’s a day off doesn’t mean that I stopped working so recording the wiki cast which is dialyzed podcast which has gone really surprisingly well like yeah we’re in the charts for podcast which is nuts Walker alright ready to record but I need to borrow this microphone because it’s I’m just here to explain all right campaign and the podcast is done I’m gonna have fun editing that one there’s quite a lot of material to work with this week fun discussion though um if you are not a reader of the podcast then definitely check us out on sponging on that recording or podcasting service of choice we’ve started recording separately which is why I was in my room and Daniel was in the nook under the stairs in my neck whoof so because I have the best girlfriend in the world you know so because I had the best girlfriend in the world I mean I objectively not live knows what I’m going through obviously like a lot of work at the moment with the PhD and so she has sent me a graze box which I’m absolutely mauling this video is not sponsored by Jake right but actually if great wanna sponsor me and send me more please do it got some poppin corn oh yeah you’ve got a afternoon infusion with a Chia coconut cookie uh-huh uh-huh Chia can you leave Dibby Dibby tattoo this is tops thank you so much live so with the podcast done it’s now five o’clock and this reveals the last reason why I wants to take my half day off this afternoon it’s gonna take some explaining so my favorite livestream Dan’s got the remote to the TV this is gonna work out so well my favorite live stream every week is Louis and Ben save the world which is two people from the Yogscast playing a really old game called XCOM and I absolutely love it and I was really keen to watch it this week because they take donations from their audience and if you’re lucky you’ll get a soldier named after you and the idea is then everyone gets really invested and like your soldier I like to point out who they all the soldiers in the game has a very low life expectancy um like you know people get really behind this I all Simon’s just coming up the wall now and I got role I got in and I’m actually a minigun it’s not like a really important person on the team a super super excited to watch at this week and probably watch myself die except it turns out that um it turns out that Lewis inventor away so we’re watching admittedly some of our other favorite youtubers playing a different game feelsbadman Lewis and Ben why please at least I have some amazing snacks courtesy of pixel girl and Dan Scott is amazing lamb curry no but normally melancholy no okay and okay hat films you want to collaborate with us there’s no boys do it right so live streams over and I’m back in my natural habitat editing so I’ve been editing for the past five or so hours I’m not sure how long it’s been and there’s a rough cut now done of this video which must be hour by the time this comes out they make a video where and Lily did down a nice makeup now it was my day half day off you might wonder why I spend however many hours at spin editing and the honest answer is yes I mean it is technically work I do for YouTube but I really like doing this and especially when it’s a project as fun as this it’s just a joy to edit it’s it’s so I’m so lucky to be able to do this kind of video actually it’s not very often I get to do it with my friends I mean we’re basically just pissing around and it’s it’s so much fun to relive honestly friends are really important in like getting you through this kind of thing and I think editor editing in a way is almost like you’re capturing friendship experiences do you can play them about whatever you want it’s quite a powerful thing also powerful however is sleep I’m just gonna get a sleep on that mattress on the floor now see you tomorrow you